Why I Quit Facebook (and you should too) | Michael White

Why I Quit Facebook (and you should too)

At 8:25am this morning I deleted my Facebook account. In this article I have detailed the reasons and perhaps why you should do the same.

Before sitting down to write this article I had to consider the many factors which may come to haunt me in the aftermath. As a student who prides himself by pushing ahead of the social media game, not only leaving Facebook but then negatively writing about it could harm future career prospects. Somewhere stored in a database in the archives of the BBC is written my name with “Facebook Hitler” next to it for Radio Stations to call whenever a negative opinion of Facebook is needed. This piece of writing isn’t exactly concerned with “Why Facebook is bad” but instead “Why Facebook isn’t right for me”. So don’t be fooled by my often cynical, frequently rampant debacle of this social network. Sitting before the PC now is a student who has grown tired of this particular breed of social network. Personally I’ve had enough and if I have written and argued well enough, perhaps you will leave Facebook too.

It all started with a Secondary School student called Shane Murphy who sent the, then considerably rare, “I’ve added you as a friend on Facebook” email. A title to this very day which doesn’t make sense as before 15th April 2007 I didn’t have a Facebook account. Indeed the first time I heard about the network (then called the thefacebook) wasn’t too long after its conception in 2004. At the time I was a member of St Paul’s Church in Cheam and was beginning to get into a scripting language called Hypertext Preprocessor (Check out ‘How Does Facebook Work?’), commonly known as PHP, the same language which binds Facebook together today. Instead of gazing at Facebook as network which would change the world, my friends and I were only interested in the technical aspects of it.

Registered to Facebook Image

Newly Registered to Facebook

Eventually I joined the network. When I decided to trawl through the emails in my inbox to find the above Facebook registration email I didn’t expect to be treading down memory lane. Since using Facebook I have never switched off email notifications and I found myself gazing at past private messages and wall posts from bygone romances, ex-girlfriends, former friends and colleagues. Such conversations should never be preserved so freshly…

Fictitious Friends, Lost Acquaintances and Stalkers
Any social network blurs the line between friend and contact. The most awful occurrences example this the most such as the death of Simone Back but most the time people live their lives out on Facebook with the feeling that they are being sociable. Facebook has removed the art of actually talking with your friends to find out how they are doing. Nowadays (I’m now beginning to sound like an old man) checking how your friends are doing simply consists of checking their social media profile. I admit this might not just be a problem with Facebook but with social media culture as a whole. However, in my view, Facebook leads the way for this unsociable generation, the Facebook generation. In conversations I found myself not asking my friends what they had been up to recently but instead ‘Oh, I saw your last Facebook status about x y z’. It drives me nuts!

Not only that but I bet most of your friends on Facebook aren’t really friends. They might simply be internet contacts who you are friendly with and added you on Facebook. In many cases Facebook is the network for lost acquaintances, the network which caused Friends Reunited to lose their share of the social network market, the network which gives you the opportunity to get back in contact with the people you never gave a shit about in the first place.

On examination my Facebook contact list features a large amount of people fom Primary School, Secondary School and Sixth Form College. Most of which I don’t have any direct communication with and may never have actually been friends originally. I was simply added because they found me on Facebook and for some reason I accepted their request (probably because I didn’t want to seem rude). Facebook allowed me to still be in communication with them (or gave the illusion thereof) and I could stalk them to my heart’s content.

Don’t think stalking is an activity on Facebook which is exclusive to the strangers, everyone does it. Stalking happens even if you don’t mean to because all of your contacts new photos, statuses, relationships, etc, will appear on the Facebook New Feed. We are all stalkers on Facebook and nobody is left behind.

Michael is a Consultant for Keene Communications where he devises and manages digital public relations campaigns. Keene Communications has been providing public affairs, public relations and representation services for over 25 years. Michael is a certified member (MCIPR) of the Chartered Institution of Public Relations (CIPR).

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  • Bastet_greypaws

    Hi Michael
    It’s Rachel (Bastet Greypaws ;) )

    Sorry if this is a bit long but I just wanted to share my experiences as well.

    I noticed you saying you were gonna leave Facebook but I was not sure what to reply at the time. Obviously felt a bit sad you were planning on leaving but I wasn’t about to tell you not to since I understood your reasons before I even decided to have a read through this article.

    I am hoping to leave Facebook one day…right now I am finding it hard to mainly from my best friend’s pressure and now my boyfriend – who has recently rejoined again, has made it even more difficult as we use the facebook messeging system over hotmail or youtube or any of the other email systems we used to use. As for why, I am really not too sure…I guess this just backs up your point how FB can have this way of taking over your life and making you addicted.

    The one thing that scares me most about Facebook is privacy. As you said, it no longer exists. My boyfriend originally made a facebook account last summer then deleted it just a few days after creating it as he then felt it was not for him. However, after a skating trip out in September and bumping into his online friends who he talks to over youtube, it made him decide to rejoin and recreate an account so he can be “more involved” with these people. Scary thing was when embarking on our task to remake him a facebook account,…he didn’t need to. He just had to reactivate his old one since Facebook never “deleted” it like we thought. We were not impressed, however, he carried on regardless of this and is still on facebook since then.

    Since then, I’ve been becoming more and more aware of such things. Over time more and more of my personal data somehow has a way of creeping up on my facebook account that I’m not even aware of half the time.

    Another issue you raised that has recently annoyed me too – are facebook photos.
    I have some wonderful friends but they are OBSESSED with taking hundreds and hundreds of photos and tagging everyone, including me. I have something like over 400 photos of me to this date, many like you described – of being out with friends, (usually intoxicated in my case!) I can’t stop them and in the past I’ve decided to just brush it off as I feel untagging myself or even deleting any of my own photos which include them, will upset them just a little bit…even though I could easily send them the photos over hotmail, it’s now become the thing to just post them up over facebook instead so everyone can view them. I’m not sure what point I’m trying to raise here that you haven’t already – I feel that this is one of the biggest reasons I will eventually quit facebook as it will do harm to my future if I am not careful and if this continues.

    Not sure you’d remember a while back I changed my full name to Bastet Greypaws, in hope it won’t show up on google but alas, one of my friends tested this for me and still found my facebook under my full name.

    As for when I’ll leave, I’m not sure…I hate the thought of being on facebook my whole life, so I know I won’t use it for years to come, I think it’s something I need to slowly get away from. Up until now though I have put off untagging myself and doing a “clean up” of my page to a suitable extent but I feel you’re article has finally encouraged me to do a full on clear out for now and hopefully make a step forward into giving up Facebook for good and moving on :)

    -Rachel

    (P.s: sorry this is rather long and I know, not spoken to you in ages but still wish to keep in contact with you so I’ll try my best to use twitter more often, especially as it now SORT OF works on Chrome on my computer xD )

    • http://twitter.com/michaelwhite1 Michael White

      Thanks Rachel for your comment, it has been a while since we last spoke!

      Completely understand about the issues you have written about here. In many ways I think Facebook adds additional complexity to our social lives through the apparent necessity to constantly check what our friends or partners are doing. I have yet to discover what it is like living a life without Facebook and so I can report on this in the future. Must confess leaving this network has left me feeling quite relaxed.

      Always surprised when people comment about their sadness about me leaving! It isn’t as if I have abandoned the internet. I have so many different social media profiles. Just Facebook is no longer one of them.

  • http://twitter.com/rebeccawoodhead Rebecca Woodhead

    Yep. This is why I close FB accounts all the time. The only thing that brings me back is how much everyone else depends on it. Feels rude to close off a channel that others need.

    As a Gen X Dot Com Pioneer, I came from a background obsessed with online privacy. If an advertiser had a single DoubleClick ad, we wouldn’t let them advertise with us. Privacy of users of our sites was the most important thing to us because we respected our customers. I wanted nothing to do with FB when I saw it. There is a special layer of Hell for Facebook’s privacy policy.

    I think there are generational issues. I got drunk and did foolish things without risk of any of it ending up online. There was even a different culture around cameras when I was at Uni in the late 90s. If someone didn’t mind having a daft picture of them in drag being taken, that was fine, but if they did… you wouldn’t take it. From what I’ve seen, that’s changed.

    I’m on Facebook for business. Anyone who asks me to water their virtual plants gets a virtual knee in their virtual privates. Anyone who tags me without a prior arrangement gets the same. I never use it as a photo album. I’ve got involved with a specific group on there that is really working out well for me from a business perspective, but I’d never post anything there that I wouldn’t post elsewhere online. I’m also very aware that private messages aren’t private.

    I’m trying to stick with Facebook because there are real benefits to using it if you do so for business rather than personal reasons. My ‘real world’ friends and I don’t connect on Facebook. We call each other, and meet up face to face.

    You can never rely on a social network to be your ‘list’. It could disappear at any time. It brings you leads, but you need to pull people off there into email lists. My focus is on building email lists that I can communicate with directly, and putting together effective marketing funnels, not faffing about, uploading pics to FB for my friends. I also stay off Skype and MSN messenger because I don’t want to chat to people all day.

    Facebook is very valuable for business if you use it right, but I’ll never use social media networks for purely social reasons. That’s why I have a phone.

  • http://blog.clayburngriffin.com/ Clayburn Griffin

    Clearly you aren’t meant for the Internet.

    • Anonymous

      Nah. Clearly not meant for Facebook.

  • Richard Bailey

    Congratulations: you’re a leader.

    Would you like to review Sherry Turkle’s new book for Behind the Spin? Turkle is an MIT professor who has also had a change of heart over social media.

    If you would, then plesae email or DM your address and I’ll send you the book.

    • http://twitter.com/michaelwhite1 Michael White

      I feel like a leaver rather than a leader!

      I would love to review a book for Behind the Spin, especially one which sounds so interesting. I’ll DM my address to you on Twitter. Thanks!

  • Toni.L.

    WELL HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO TALK TO YOU NOW!!!!!!! :( i really couldnt read this. i read the first page and thought.. its 3.30am. i had to google you to find this you know. because you were gone from my facebook :(
    ANYWAYSSSSSS. i would give you my number only everyone can read it. so instead you can email me yourssss and i can text you hello. toni_x_stresso@hotmail.com. now you can guess who it is. nice seeing you on the train the otherday. come back to facebook!!!! LOLLLL.
    xxx

  • http://www.stationcars.org Cheam cars

    This one is very interesting information of face book.I like to use face book social site.This one is best social networking site.I like privacy of face book site and also it’s facilities.This one is really one of the best site.

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